Thank you for for the inputs.
I've been exploring some ideas following Minsky's book Society of Mind, and have built an "Inter-Process Network" that lets a large number of small independent programs communicate with each other. The network "server" occupies 242KB and a typical "client" about the same depending on what it does, so my old PC can support a respectable number of clients. I explored SimpleIPC in this use case, but it's too big. I'm using fcl-net and localhost instead. The network works, but could be sped up if I had some really cheap way of letting the server notify a client that it "has mail" -- hence the search for a low-overhead one-bit signalling method native to the OS.
I hadn't thought about trying to use dbus or shmget , but will look into them. Thanks for the ideas.